The root cause for issues in marriages are contentions of the wife and lack of authority from husband. This is true in many Christian couples today. In this post, we will explore from Scriptures, the reasons for contentions of a wife and how to avoid them by being submissive.
Contentions of a Wife
Better to dwell in the wilderness, Than with a contentious and angry woman.
[It is] better to dwell in a corner of a housetop, Than in a house shared with a contentious woman.
Prov 21:9; 21:19 & Prov 25:24
As we read in proverbs, living with a contentious woman is worse than living in wilderness or in a corner of a housetop. The Hebrew word is translated into strife, contention, quarrelsome. In other words, a constant fight between husband and wife within the family.
The contentions of a wife [are] a continual dripping.
A continual dripping on a very rainy day And a contentious woman are alike;
Prov 19:13 & Prov 27:15
Bible also says that the contentions of a wife are like continual dripping on a very rainy day. While it is not good for a healthy marriage, why do contentions arise?
Prideful Wife
He who is of a proud heart stirs up strife, But he who trusts in the LORD will be prospered.
By pride comes nothing but strife, But with the well-advised [is] wisdom.
Prov 28:25 & Prov 13:10
The most important reason for strife or contention is pride. Where there is pride, there will always be strife.
.. Your heart is lifted up because of your riches
Ezek 28:5 & Ezek 28:17
Your heart was lifted up because of your beauty ..
Prophet Ezekiel mentions riches and beauty are reasons for pride of Tyre. This is true for everyone including the wife in any marriage. If the wife has any pride in her heart about her career, income, beauty or riches which could be above her husband, then there will be always strife in the family. 1 John 2:16 mentions that the pride of life is not of the Father but of the world.
Submission to Husband
Wives, likewise, [be] submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct [accompanied] by fear.
1 Pet 3:1-2
Instead of pride in heart, wives must be submissive to their own husbands even if they are blessed with a good career, more income or riches. When a wife is in submission to her husband, there will not be any contention or strife. This doesn’t mean the wife must be submissive to a harsh husband who is a scoundrel as we read in 1 Samuel 25 regarding Abigail who did contrary to what Nabal did to David’s men. In spite of what Abigail did, she not only acted wisely but meant no harm to Nabal but protected him.
Conclusion
The wise woman builds her house, But the foolish pulls it down with her hands.
Prov 14:1
Contentions of a wife are mostly due to her prideful heart. If the wife has any pride in her heart about her career, income, beauty or riches which could be more than her husband, then there will be always strife in the family. When a wife is submissive to her husband, there will not be any contention or strife.
Hi,
Thank you for this simple and clear reminder.
It was very clarifying to me. Sama as your other article on husband’s authority.
I will pray God on this basis.
God Bless!
THE 2 ROOT SINS ARE PRIDE AND UNBELIEF…ALL SIN COMES FROM THOSE 2 ROOT SINS. ALL SIN THAT WE SEE ARE THE ROOTS AND FRUITS OF PRIDE AND UNBELIEF! SO WHEN WE ARE COUNSELING PEOPLE AND THEY START TELLING US THAT THEY ARE DEALING WITH ANGER OR TRUST ISSUES OR CONTROL ISSUES OR LUST AND LYING AND STEALING AND ADULTERY OR HATRED OR PHYSICAL ABUSE, FEAR, DISOBEDIENCE COWARDISE AND ALL THE OTHER FRUITS OF SIN THEY CAN BE TRACED BACK TO PRIDE AND UNBELIEF. IT CAN BE ONE OR A COMBINATION OF THE TWO. MANY PEOPLE REPENT OF THE SYMPTOMS AND MANIFESTED FRUIT OF THE SIN BUT NEVER GET FREE B/C THEY ARE CONFESSING AND REPENTING OF THE FRUIT AND NOT DEALING WITH THE ROOT OF THE SIN. THE WAY FOR ANY PERSON OR FAMILY TO GET ALONG IS TO CHOOSE TO WALK AND LIVE IN HUMILITY AND TRUST GOD FOR ALL THINGS. MICAH 6:8, PSALM138:6, 1PETER5:5-11, JAMES 4:6. HEB3:7-19. SO MANY TIMES GOD CAN’T DO WHAT HE WANTS TO DO B/C OF OUR UNBELIEF AND IT WILL BRING YOU TO HELL IF YOU CONTINUE IN IT. REVELATION 21:8. A PERSON THAT IS PROUD CAN NEVER REALLY KNOW OR BE CLOSE TO GOD B/C GOD RESISTS THE PROUD AND ONLY KNOWS THEM AT A DISTANCE…PSALM138:6; MT13:58, MK6:5-6. WALK IN HUMILITY AND ALWAYS BELIEVE AND TRUST AND HAVE FAITH IN GOD THAT HE IS ALWAYS TRYING TO BRING YOU TO THE NEXT LEVEL OF FAITH SO THAT YOU CAN LOVE HIM MORE AND LET HIM WORK THROUGH YOU TO EXTEND HIS KINGDOM! HEB 11:6, MATT4:19, LK19:10, MT28:19-20, LK24:46-53, ACTS 1:8.REV14:6-7, 12; 17:14, 22:1-21. FAITH AND HUMILITY IS A CHOICE AND WHEN WE WALK IN THEM WE WILL MAKE OUR LIVES AND THE LIVES OF THOSE AROUND US MORE PEACEFUL IN EVERY WAY, AND GOD WILL BLESS YOU GREATLY!
MT5:3-48.MICAH6:8.
wives are not to submit , husband and wife are equal ,
Managers and workers are equal before the law doesn’t mean both have same roles and responsibilities. The manager makes the decision on the project and assigns tasks which the worker completes it. So does husband and wife have different roles and responsibilities in the family with wife to submit to her husband and husband to love his wife, yet both are created equally before God in His own image.